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A unique country: the stories of a Bulgarian woman in Japan

There, politeness is on a pedestal, there is no swearing, and respect for others is part of people's DNA

Nov 4, 2024 23:01 108

A unique country: the stories of a Bulgarian woman in Japan  - 1
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In Japan, trilogies most often end in fiasco. The number four brings misfortune. However, Yuliana Antonova-Murata is not superstitious. On the contrary, she just bought an apartment in Tokyo on the fourth floor and published the fourth book in her series of stories about Japan. What he truly believes in is the power of goodness, beauty and love. "We cannot get used to ugliness, we cannot get used to ugly manners, to bad words. You don't get used to them," Juliana is convinced. "In Japan, you'll never hear swear words, because they just don't exist," she says. And he shares that when something angers or offends them, the Japanese will just shut up and back away. "In Japan, before education, the emphasis is on upbringing. They want everyone to be educated," the writer emphasizes.

"Hai Hai, Japan"

"Kam san", "lady turtle"... Juliana tells how her little grandson turned to the animal when he gave it food. It sounds sweet and childishly naive, but this is by no means an isolated phenomenon. In Japan "san" - Mr. or Mrs. - are not only strangers, but also people in the family. Addressing the mother is "okáa san" - "lady mother", which aims to pay respect to her and her role. It is unthinkable for someone to be called only by their first name, nor for an older person to be called "grandma" or "grandfather".

Once born in the family, respect is passed down the chain - to friends, to teachers, to neighbors. This attitude is far from a mere formality. It builds the character of the Japanese from an early age and affects their self-awareness as a nation. "The Japanese recognize themselves as one people, as one family, a big family - and their home is not only at home, their home is also on the street, in their city, in their country," observes Juliana. I remember how when she once jokingly suggested to her Japanese husband that they should move to Bulgaria if Japan were to suffer a major earthquake, he replied: "Of course, but before that we will stay here in Japan - to help the others, if we are healthy and not injured".

"We like the Japanese very much"

Julianna Antonova-Murata has been living in Japan for more than 20 years. Love takes her there for the first time. In Bulgaria, she met a Japanese man, whom she married. Later, he moved with his family to Tokyo, where he worked as a cultural attaché at the Bulgarian embassy. Juliana herself calls the stories she tells her lessons. She hopes that through her books they will reach at least one more person. This year saw the release of "Hai Hai, Japan", the last book in her Japanese tetralogy.

"Xai hi" is a greeting that expresses sympathy and good feeling. This benevolence stands out not only in the last book, but in all the books in the series. They do not aim to compare Bulgaria with Japan, nor to point out the shortcomings of one country. On the contrary, Juliana's heart is filled with a lot of love for Bulgaria and she likes to talk about her homeland in Japan. And the Japanese really like the unadulterated Bulgarian emotionality, so contrasting to their norm of behavior. "They really like us Bulgarians. He has such a wonderful attitude towards us that it is touching. They think that we are an intelligent, smart people, that we are beautiful, educated - and they respect us, value us, love us", says Yuliana.

In our conversation, the writer draws attention to an important feature: "It is of particular importance for the Japanese not to enter the other's perimeter. I very often consider this topic in my stories," notes the author.

"We do not know who carries what cross and how heavy it is"

For the Japanese, entering personal space happens not only with actions, but also verbally. There, lessons in resourcefulness begin from early childhood. They are not limited only to not interfering with others, but also build a subtle sensitivity, thanks to which a person can feel someone else's pain.

"It is very nice when we are not only that introverted type who only listens to our own desires, but look with our eyes at those around us. We don't know who carries what cross and how heavy it is," says Juliana.

Although she is not superstitious, the writer believes in miracles. She is convinced that they really happen when kindness has opened the human heart to them. And especially for the miracle of love.

Author: Stea-Maria Miteva